how accidents happen.
i had that thought tonight on my late night ride back to home. everything is a pretty incredibly timed accident.
we get caught up in the expectations of life. our mind dictates most of our time and we follow it pretty unconditionally. and then life happens. then you find something close to or you do really find God.
* * *
nothing is an accident. i’ve realised that quite profoundly. and the best part is when you get that you see that everything is a play. a drama. a living out of what is inside you and what you still have to process, experience understand.
this week i achieved a strange kind of clarity. to be myself.
this is definitely an accident. i didn’t get here because i wanted to. i just got some gift, which led me to this beautiful place.
an accident is something that happens without you expecting it to, without you trying.
today after a week of new steps, and new ideas i remembered this phrase. ye tang che. hopeless. a place where you have come, after being fed up, totally tired out, to accept that you are where you are. and nowhere else is better. its so clear. the sky changes shades all day. clouds drift. the wind moves everywhere in different ways. the coolness turns to sweat with a jog. the sweat melts into the skin with the breeze.
its late. so late. and i’ve been up for so long. there is a certain mania in my days. i am starting to get a visual. before it was always so blurry moving, fast, here there and where I am, I don’t remember.
now. its soft. and its sweet. things come and go and as they do. people come and go. and as. they .do
so many walk in circles. and there you are again. with the same as before. but its different this new spiral. i can feel the freshness. in my tiredness. in my bones there is a new shedding. knowing there are many more burns and scrapes to come still. knowing there are mysteries unsolved in each paradox.
there are images in my mind. they can’t be translated. they are stuck. in a vision of reality that is mixed. murky&clear and all words beyond to capture it.